“Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.” John F. Kennedy

I have done several behavioral-based assessments and was interested in a deeper dive into my primary motivations and those of the team members with whom I work. I was able to start using the results of Hien’s debrief immediately. I was entering a new job, role, and sector, and the enneagram helped me better understand what drives me, especially as I began to forge new relationships with colleagues. The enneagram helped me cut through the difference between many of my stronger personality traits and distill the foundational aspects of what motivates me in the workplace and in life. Hien’s perspective was particularly helpful in understanding the complementary enneagram types that also play an important role in what drives me as well as how my type complements (or challenges) others of different types with whom I interact. This was the only assessment I’ve ever taken which had initial results that were a big surprise. Once we peeled back the layers in the debrief, the full picture made sense and the distinction between what motivates an individual and how they act was particularly profound since the outward manifestation of behavior could mask very different motivations and drivers. It is well worth the commitment and it may well make you a bit uncomfortable at first, but could add much value if you are open to learning something new about yourself. I wish I could mandate this assessment for my team members!

 I see how much of my behavior is influenced by my enneagram type, especially when I am under stressful situations. After the assessment, I have additional tools to use when I am in conflict or under stress. I understand a little more about myself and in relation to other people. My blind spots analysis states that I “may not be aware of how intimidating” I am to other people due to the level of energy I bring. I have been told of my intimidation factor but confused by it since I have been shy for most of my adolescence and very aware not to communicate over- confidence. I realize that the energy I bring to an activity I am passionate about can be daunting for others. Since then, I practice more mindfulness in my communication to allow for others to feel more free to be part of the conversation. I am surprised how the results have helped me understand myself and others. 

 I was motivated to do the Enneagram assessment and debrief because Hien encouraged me and recommended it for a better perspective on how I operate on a team with others. I have also always been motivated to understand myself, my actions, and motivations on a deeper level and found the Enneagram framework intriguing. I felt really validated and found that the assessment describes my personality and motivations very well. It has given me language and a framework to talk about it and goals to work towards. I am more aware of why I react to certain situations in a certain way. For instance, I require a lot of communication and experience a lack thereof as a breach of trust. Knowing this about myself allows me to clearly communicate my needs to other members on my team and also mitigate potential overreactions. I was not terribly surprised by the results. Do it. It will give you a framework to understand yourself better and provide you with a language to talk about your motivations and objectives and challenge you with growth goals. Hien is a knowledgeable and passionate Enneagram coach and I challenge you to do the assessment and debrief with her, you will not regret it. 

I did the enneagram first and found it helpful in understanding my core motivation for why I do what I do. As I discussed it with my partner, we both wondered what insights we could gain if he also took the test. That would have been helpful in itself but the real benefit and aha moments came from meeting together with Hien who could help us see how our 2 very different motivations could learn to work together rather than end up in conflict, silence or distance from each other. Much of what my partner learned about me was not new but what was new was that he began to see how what motivated him could quickly overwhelm me. I learned that my great desire to keep my life peaceful meant that I often gave in (at least on the outside) but risked losing sight of who God made me to be. In the same way I grew in understanding what drives him from his core which helps me to give grace for things that are so different from me.

One of the things that has changed in our relationship is that (as a 9) I am trying to hear from God about a decision rather than from my partner. That doesn't mean we aren't in agreement but it has changed how we get there in a way that has given me a voice. We also can laugh at our differences rather than be annoyed by them now that we understand what underlies our actions. For couples who genuinely want to continue to grow deeper with each other this is a great tool to expose some of our weaknesses and build on our strengths. Having a seasoned enneagram coach like Hien is not only helpful but I think critical in really processing the results of the test in a genuine way. Just reading a book we can still be misled by our own perceptions. Having a coach in the journey helps to go to the deep places where real change occurs.

Despite multiple efforts I could not, for the life of me, understand my husband! Okay — seriously though. . .we had each separately completed an enneagram assessment during our respective executive careers and found it to be exceptionally powerful. When we learned that a couples enneagram assessment and debrief was available, we jumped at the opportunity. The assessment explained behaviors witnessed by providing rationale and drivers for those behaviors, particularly the desire to live life fully and not “miss out." It reinforced much of how I understood myself and provided him with a framework for understanding my positions or responses in various circumstances. We focus much more on underlying drivers in our collective behavior and engage with one another with more thoughtful understanding. My husband’s Core Enneagram Type is the same as my Release Type, and given I’m secure and comfortable with him, it puts us in a unique place where we tend to expand our thinking and vision — together. Very cool! The fact that his Core and my Release are the same, explains why we lose folks in our conversations — both when we worked together and in our personal lives. We speak the same language and believe we are being clear and communicative, but somehow, while we keep driving forward on the same page, we have left others behind! We both gained from this knowledge and experience — increasing self‐awareness, no matter how high the level, is only valuable when applying that knowledge in the context of others — we live our lives in relationship with other people. Going a step forward, being provided a high level of understanding of your partner’s “self” provides greater comprehension of conversations and actions. For us, it strengthened our appreciation for one another. This “tool” is powerful — it takes time to take‐in the depth of the assessment, and Hien was critical in our comprehension and appreciation of the assessment. The greatest benefit is understanding our relationship — where we experience tension and where we experience joy!